damage control

Ahh, the morning after. It is that dreaded moment when you wake up slowly realizing you have no idea how you ended up getting home to pass out on your own couch wearing your friend’s shirt and have stickers from the local radio station plastered all over your jeans, especially around the ass area. You look around your apartment thru squinty eyes while you try to adjust to the light and newly formed pounding headache. You see Jack in the Box wrappers next to you from food you don’t remember eating and a half drunk glass of milk on the coffee table which undoubtedly sounded delicious last night but looks disgusting now. What did you do last night?! After that seventh shot of Petron it all becomes a blur. You have flashes of kissing that waiter, yelling at some skank in the bathroom, and laughing hysterically to three year old Anchorman movie quotes… but the important details seem to be lost. Damn. It’s time to flip open your cell phone and check your call lists. Check who you called and who called you. It’s time to suck it up and begin calling those people back to not only piece together last night’s festivities but to asses damage control. Hopefully whatever mayhem you incited will all blow over soon…

And probably, luckily for you, it will. By next weekend, one of your other friends will make an ass of them selves and quickly take over the spotlight. (Or, if your friends are real party animals, maybe one of them even overshadowed you last night… which is something to hope for!) However, if this does happen to you soon, just remember how lucky you are because it could be so much worse: you could be famous and you could have been videotaped. Drunken shame like that will be passed thru celeb magazines and gossip websites like wildfire making your embarrassing escapade be front page news before you even get rid of that hangover. So, to try and overshadow your own drunken behavior this past weekend (or at least to make you feel better that you weren’t the only one to make an ass of yourself!), I have posted a link to a video list of awesome drunk celebrity moments. Watching a wasted Ashlee Simpson, P. Diddy, Ben Affleck, Britney Spears, and a ton more will help ease your own walk of shame. Not even our current President is exempt from this list of drunken shame.

To see the videos yourself, please click here. Enjoy!